Okey anyone who is going to read this will definitely take me to be out of my senses nevertheless I am going to say it! I think this Facebook application really does have some weirdn accuracy rate attached to it!!

Why??

Well as for my latest prediction received from her, she wants me to keep a journal for my dreams.( nightmares I would prefer to call them) because I would be able to develop my creativity or something and analyse my subconscious. Well creativity I have no clue about and then my subconscious I no none of too. But then Freud used to say that your hidden desires would be revealed through your dreams. Now I am trying to apply the steps to my latest dream.

Like yesterday I dreamt of my sister being murdered and buried in the beach. ( Don’t ask me which beach, I can’t remember all the details! ) And then shehad been for two days! (Yes you tell me how sick this sounds??!! )

Now what sort of creativity can I get out of this sick nightmare??

Whats more, when discovered she was smiling!! Murdered and smiling!! ( Wonderful! I mean not that she is such merely that even in my nighmares she likes to provide me with paradoxes or some horror movie which is too comic to be horrrific!)

So even in my sleep I find myself wondering how she could be laughing?? (Ok probably I was dreaming of some stupid practical joke!! )

And Freud’s theory applied to this would it be that I want her dead or I want myself to be dead?? This is too weird even to be analysing. (  By the way, Pramudith if you are reading this blog, no need to panick, I have NO intention of killing my sister and NO I am more than glad with her living version!) Wow how depressing have I got of late?? ( Even I am impressed in this weird and insanely mode with my morbid life!! )

And me being me, I keep on analysing and then wonder whether this has anything to do with my planned trip to the coast tomorrow. Was this a sign highlighting  that I should stay home and not run off in my gypsy style?? The beach, the death, the I don’t know what!!

Well life is so freaking confusing to understand of late and Aunty Anita the online psychic seems to get what’s in my head.

Now ain’t that super freaky??

I mean even freakier than me?? 🙂

PS. I know whatever I have typed out is not the most pleasant but then what am I to do?? That is exactly of what I dreamt…

I have been trying to type many things but never got actually to do it. The days at the Unawatuna beach and then other things that seemed important. But I think I am back to the inactive mood with too much on my shoulders and then waiting without doing anything worthwhile
😦 yeah that is the latest Vositha mood!

At times it’s the best mood to be in when things keep dragging me down, then limited solely to a days time span. The longer it goes on I transform into this pessimistic and ranting creature who makes no sense of anything! Which is exactly my privileged transformation for this moment! ( yes I love my exclamation marks! They help me release my energy!!! Those language experts are kindly requested not to try teaching me when and where to use it!! I loooooove using the exclamation mark! Atleast for the time being. )

I go through options that my idling day offers me. A movie marathon…mmm … i have watched almost all the movies that lay around. Out!

Clean up the room… nopes that takes too much time as well. May be the whole day!! ( Heather would agree with me on this! )Aaaaaaaaaargh!

Watch “Friends” !! Naaaaaaah!

Ok this is getting a a little tiring right now ( why do I use present continuous here instead of present perfect?? Ok never mind that is a question to which the answer I don’t think i would be too keen on hearing.)

Yes moving on as to why my day is tiring b the second it’s cz i don’t seem to be having anything to do and the things that Ihave to do I don’t want to do!! ( Latest resolution for Self Improvememt : Never do anything you don’t want to do! Duly noted!! )

Blogs to update, human rights article to be completed by Sunday ( I have no clue where to begin in the first place!!) and exams and more exams coming up!!

AAAAARGH!! I rest my case!

I am frustrated and I am forgetting my English!!

I was walking on the coast of  Colombo clicking away photographs and having a good time with Heather  when I suddenly heard the loud horn and the larger than life image of the train engine barely 10m behind me!!

Grab Heather’s hand and jump out of the track!

Not a thought, just a reflex action that saved both our lives.

I heard the people screaming asking whether we were crazy, the train slowing and stopping 20m ahead from where we stood.

Narrow escape! Phew!

That was all I could think of while we both laughed hysterically and I tried to cover my face to hide the humiliation of being seen as a retarded moron who was not able to hear the train honk.

Was it just a near death experience?

Not really. It finally made me see lot of things in perspective. That life is so short and futile. One mistake or not even a mistake on your part can end it. We were just two fools who thought it was fun to walk on that railway track and were distracted and oblivious to the extent that we did not hear the train that was right behind us.

It was ironic that I even joked with Heather about getting knocked off by a train a few minutes before the incident happened.

The whole stupid incident opened my eyes to things to which that we never pay much attention. Things like telling someone how I really feel about them, expressing gratitude and affection each day to those who care, doing what I have to when I have to and spending as much  time with those I love.

Life can be busy and I am busy all the time, but this taught me that we are all too engrossed in the routine of life to pay attention to the little things in life and  that most of us end up not doing what we really want to do.

I forgot for a moment the accident that almost took place, the possibility of having almost died, or got handicapped, and headed off to have a good time. 

But now looking back I realise it was a lesson.  A lesson that highlighted to me how fragile our life is and how easy it is to lose it. Hence do what I want to do without postponement and be happy with what I have because this moment is precious and unique, I won’t live it again, ever! So try to live it to the fullest.

It’s been a week full of interesting things and me going insomniac and manic. Love found, love lost and trust found and trust lost. Life is full of paradoxes and most of which I have discovered and rediscovered over the last few days. Confusions and more confusions, and disappointment and letting go, welcomes and good byes. Few things among many that I have choseN to endure and endured, forced to endure and learnt from.

Life is funny.
Despite all the shit it teaches us that there is still hope, things to look forward to and that what happens is just a momentous thing and then we overcome its grief or disappointment and move on. We are the masters of our mind as Invicutus puts it. It’s just a decision made by us to move on, forgive and then forget for all the pain caused, all the lies told and all the heartache that we suffered.
Life is hope.
It makes us see that silver lining which highlights every dark cloud. It teaches to look for a sunnier day and that we are stronger than we ever thought we were. Put ourselves to the test and then we realise that we are like the phoenix who rises from the ashes in its more beautiful and inspiring form. We strive to be that, we become that. We are the light that comes out of the tunnel yet keeps shining for those who are in the darkness within it to find their way out from it.
Life is Contentment.
Looking around you realise those who are happy are those who are satisfied yet strive for perfection. We come across hurdles in life and still we overcome them. We suffer the hardest yet manage to smile through them. We are just content with who we are though we are not the richest not the most luckiest. We are just glad that we are who we are 🙂
A few things that i have learned and helped me keep my sanity. Love happens, and when it does, we are the happiest . By the way I am mighty glad and happy for two of my bestest friends who found their love over the week 🙂 ! ( you guys know who I am talking of) And well if it doesn’t happen, it just ain’t the right time. It will take its own time and I am definitely happy with who I am 🙂
and yes

 I am loved 🙂