I have this bad habit of pondering on life at regular intervals. Then of course venting my frustration by typing a blog. What bugged me today was the question on how people would take it if I were to move in with someone!
Behold all the reactions that will flow in!
Mum’s friends will go, “chee that daughter of hers! How can she do such a thing after all that the parents have done for her!? What a shame!”
Then mum would go “What is wrong with you, you want to give your dad a heart attack?” (yes she is all about emotional black mail and dad getting a heart attack being the latest threat. She would go “come home early, dad is not well and all!” I am like “really?”)
So the question pops up, how much are we able to make a decision about our lives nowadays. It is super funny how my mum is chilled about my sharing a room with a man if I am not in the country, but if I were to do the same while in Colombo, I am sure she would flip.
Travelling with a man when not in the country is acceptable, but in the country, well takes a little difficulty to swallow up. (though eventually she is forced to, as she seems to have run out of options)
I was having this chat with a friend a few weeks back, on how one cannot really know a person till you really live with that person. Like little things such as those shoes that are thrown all over, the socks which are never in place, or reading the newspaper while brushing teeth (if you do not believe that people do so, trust me I have met a few who do) which irritate you. Well these will never be known unless and until you wake up to find that person caught in the act! (I remember the horror of the first sight of one walking around brushing teeth for good twenty minutes and then reading the newspaper with a brush in hand, and foam in mouth!)
So yea, what do you do when you discover this, after signing some paper, after legitimising the “union”? how are you to deal with it, when you realize that you cannot live with all these weird habits. Kick the moron out, or file for divorce? Dammit, what kind of mess do you have to put yourself just because such messed up “norm” required you follow such “norms”? I have met friends who got married just cause they wanted to have sex, and their parents were phone harassing them so much that they did not even have a minute to make out in peace when they were on a date! (no it was not a happy ending, they ended up going through a divorce after about a year of marriage. So much for getting married!)
Fine leave alone living with a man, say I want to move out just by myself, how would that be viewed?
Well it will be the same scenario I guess (if the parents are in the same vicinity, and your only reason to move out is to gain some autonomy and lead your life the way you want). “Look at that girl, moving out while her poor parents are living all alone!” quite a possible expression to be heard I presume.
Or it could jolly well be “I am sure she wants to lead a loose life, you know bring in her men and all, can’t do so when she is with parents noh!”
What bloody rubbish!!
It’s high time people get over their dumb hypocrisy and their double standards. And who the hell said that a girl should be under the parents roof till she got married?
What the fuck!! What if one never gets married? Should you live under the parents roof till an old maid?
Hell NO! Screw thy norms! I sure have better things to do!